Unforgotten
by PandemoniumPrincess
Summary: #8. Another tragic romance. Another preordained destiny. Another star-crossed lovers. Another AU story of Usui Takumi and Ayuzawa Misaki. Oneshot. Rated M.


Disclaimers: -_-… blah blah blah.

A/N: Since Heiress is beginning to enter its complicated state; I've decided to take a very brief break. So yeah, this is no more than a short one shot that I've planned to not put on the More Love category since it was very—or would be very long—and that it could stand on its own, I hope it was making sense. So please, do read it. :)

Designation: Unforgotten

Category: Romance X Angst

Combination: Usui Takumi X Ayuzawa Misaki

Dedication: Ael, Tricia, Jam, Gladd and Leth

Motivation: clouds? Laughs. Xian Lim

Unforgotten

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Unforgotten

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Unforgotten

_Love is something no one could easily forget. It was the kind of emotion that is innocent enough… harmless enough… anodyne enough and innocuous enough to never be forgotten even if it ends quite badly. Love is every positive thing this world describes it to be._

—_PandemoniumPrincess_

Everyone was staring at Ayuzawa Misaki, the lady dressed in an expensive Vera Wang gown. It was no secret that as soon as she entered the room, she had gotten every spectators attention. Everyone knew that she was simply timid and not a chatty person—in fact, she was the no-nonsense type of woman people would easily fear and avoid. She didn't like people who only wanted her attention for fame. She wanted them blunt and buoyant and original—because straightforwardness, confidence and originality comes from deep within the heart.

And all negative things originate from the dark thoughts that are hidden so well on its dark corners.

She was a woman on mission that very night. As the representative of a very well known Association of Medical Doctors, she was invited to attend a charity event dedicated for orphanages and homes for the aged. It was a wonder to everyone why a woman who already has everything—and whose life remains a mystery to everyone—had devoted herself to helping the poor. With her busy schedule and all, it was already impossible to help people she was not obliged to help.

Everybody thought it was weird, because in their world, helping the poor is something that should be shown-off. It is only to instigate rumors—once again, for the sake of their public personality.

Everyone stared at her, and she was utterly aware of it, and with all honesty, she was very much peeved about it. What she hated the most is being the center of attention and in fact, if only she could decide about it, she would very much want for people to simply ignore her presence—no matter how noticeable she was.

She went on around the room in search of the instigator of the charity ball who had decided to sign a contract with them with regards to the charity plan their association plans to uphold for the sake of those who are in need. Even if he had already signed in to their side, her task is still to make sure she'd keep him well entertained and interested on their plans.

As she move with such refinement and virility, everybody watched her. She was picturesque—stunning even, that even the other ladies bidden on such prestigious event observed her with resentment in their unsatisfied eyes. She was unable to find the person very vital for the implementation of their program since they weren't properly introduced and yet, despite the irritation she felt raging inside her at the moment, she decided not to show her frustration for public viewing.

Ayuzawa Misaki is a poker-faced doctor—aside from one person who was able to see past everything she has hidden from the rest of the world—nobody else was able to get close to her enough for her to showcase her emotions.

She didn't have the right to stare at him the way he watched her in mocked amusement, but Usui Takumi is just as noticeable as she were—maybe even more than she was. Unlike her who is accompanied by no one—since she refused every invites to be her date—Takumi was surrounded by woman obviously trying to flirt with him. But much to her pleasure, he seemed to want to have nothing to do with them. Instead, he was staring at her with too much preference in his eyes as if he'd rather be with her than be with them.

She tried to ignore him even if every living cell inside her body is very much aware of him. His gaze stimulated her, and on her part, it was very uncomfortable and disturbing. She had long forgotten about him—everything that happened between them belonged in the past now. She promised him she'd forget—it was an agreement. And he, too, had agreed with it.

Since he was going to be Duke in his family's kingdom, it would be much better for both of them to be apart.

It was an agreement which both of them had agreed upon.

Back then, they were children—love is an impulsive emotion, driven only by their physical desires. She has been told once to be a child, incapable to decide on big decisions, incompetent of doing anything, unworthy to someone she deeply cared about. She wanted them to be together, but everything was set on the wrong time, wrong place and everything they shared is of wrong reasons.

They were children, and that thought left a mark on her. She was so in love—or so she thought—but because of those things told to her, now, she was unable to love again. Uncertainty became her shadow; insecurity became the darkest part of her. So, she promised him she'd forget, and they exchanged smiles as if their three year relationship didn't at all exist that long.

He was smiling. She was smiling. But deep inside, she was so certain he had shattered her—so, she decided to forget.

"Ah, Dr. Ayuzawa, again, it was such a pleasure to see you."

She swiftly escaped the confines of her scratched past and stared at the person who had the nerve to greet her at such a wrong time since her mood is at its worst and instantly, she altered her disposition to greet the president of the Igarashi zaibatsu—a gigantic association of varying businesses; a colossal business empire.

Yet, even if he was someone respectful, she decided not to give away a smile. Instead, she bowed her head formally, establishing distance and formality in between them. "Good evening to you, too, President Igarashi."

He was still handsome, and she was certain he was still as lecherous as ever so she decided to keep her distance. He was wearing an expensive black three-piece suit that seemed to have mirrored his evil personality, and around him are his bodyguards, which don't seem totally necessary for today's high-profile event.

She looked around while he pondered about business related discussion in search for the business partner that she was supposed to lead around that very night. But whereas she looked, everyone was either talking about her or Usui Takumi. She had already received a warning from the Association due to her inattentiveness and tonight was supposed to be the night she were to entertain their special partner who was never introduced formally to her. All she was given were brief and trivial facts she didn't need—even the name wasn't formally given to her: all was said was that that partner know her and that he would personally introduced himself to her.

And already, it was giving her the bad feeling.

Spectators were confused when they noticed the look of confusion on Dr. Ayuzawa's face. She was beautiful, but that kind of expression only adds more profile on her already well established persona. And they don't need another reason to admire her more.

But already, they could notice the sexual attraction between the renowned doctor and the handsome Duke. They had the spark nobody was able to deny and their every move was sensual—as if they were trapped inside a world only them knows.

Much to Misaki's chagrin, the lights suddenly got switched off—the entrée to the representative dance that was about to come—and it had interrupted her plan of searching the whole crowd for their mysterious sponsor. The emcee spoke his already practiced greetings to the invited ones on the charity ball before music echoed around the grand room.

The attention of everyone was diverted to the exhibition.

Nobody noticed when the striking Duke moved in the darkness—blending in the shadows quite well—and stopped right behind the committed doctor.

"Ayuzawa…"

Misaki nearly jumped out of shock when she felt his warm breath brushing against her sensitive ear—and he was well aware of that—and immediately, she tried to relaxed the intense beating of her heart at the thought of him behind her. She remained firm on her expressionless emotion, and tried to play the same game he was playing then and even now.

_Relax, _she said to herself repeatedly. _Its just Usui, no one special. _"Good evening to you too, Duke Walker." She said as calm as she could. She needed calmness and formality since they are worlds apart now. They were children back then, they were driven by physical needs—nothing else. Tonight is just one of those nights which is unavoidable enough to meet him. After this night, everything will turn back to normal again: they won't see each other anymore.

It was an agreement.

"Why so formal, I thought we're friends now."

_Friends, _the word sounded so bitter in her own tongue. Because God knows that she wanted everything about him but not friendship. They were friends, all right, but that was before they engage in such passionate relationship that got complicated as time pass by. When he broke up with her, everything just disappeared: her emotions, her affections… her ability to love… her skill to care… her everything. She became so vulnerable she feared loving again because it might end up the way things ended up between her and Takumi.

Or worst, if it wasn't Takumi, then he wouldn't be good enough for her.

"We are in a public place, Duke Walker." Misaki says again. "It would be better if you would refrain from speaking with people you would not gain any benefit from. Do excuse me—" but it startled her when Takumi's warm palm suddenly encircled around her tiny wrist. She tried to shake him off. "Let me go." She mumbled as calm as she could; making sure their conversation wouldn't be heard since there were also people near them.

"I came all the way from England to see you and this is how you greet me." He answered her back with provocation. "I wanted to see you, Ayuzawa."

_No! No, this wouldn't affect me. Not now. Not ever. _She shakes him off again and pretended as if she was interested on the traditional dance. "You know I never wanted to see you anymore. We had an agreement, remember?"

"You call that kind of deal an agreement?"

"Then, we got a deal." Misaki rephrased. He broke her heart—and again, he was well aware of it—so, why is he saying this kind of thing now as if what he had previously done to her didn't existed at all? All her life the only thing she ever wanted aside from him is to forget her memories with him, it seemed as if Takumi did not have any plans to completely release her from their nightmare.

"It's an agreement—a deal—both of us had agreed upon." She added, rubbing it on his serene and ethereal face. "I'm only keeping my side of the bargain, so please, don't speak with me anymore. It would be for the better."

"You think I'd be easily put off with that?" his tone was challenging, almost mocking her. But the years that went by had taught her how to be strong, how to be unfeeling… how to be insensitive and callous. Nothing—no one—should affect her. Her face should always be voided with expression because it represents strength and control—and she needed strength and control since she lack those traits when he just disappeared from her life just like that.

When the lights disappeared again, it startled her when Takumi dragged her even closer to his hard body. Her skin went another degree hotter again, and it was making her even more uncomfortable. It wasn't supposed like this. She had already forgotten about him. "I didn't come here to fight with you again, Ayuzawa. I'm here to fix things."

"There isn't anything to fix—"

"Silence." He hissed at her before releasing her again when the lights reappeared. He easily composed himself while she had so much trouble fixing her composure. And that was when she was able to have a closer look on him.

Usui Takumi—the new Duke of Raven Castle and Rochester—became an even more astounding man now. The traces of childishness on his face was replaced by even more defined lines now, and his eyes, they were an even stronger shade of emerald now. It was a harsh color to her sight, but it still had the same hypnotizing effect on her. His body was well muscled on every part and she couldn't help but flushed upon remembering the feel of his skin rubbing against hers. His hair was thick and still had the same golden brown shade, and his lips… they were utterly sensual even if tightly shut. She resisted the urge of leaning forward to kiss him, to feel his lips caressing hers again in comfort. Even if she wanted everything about him, even if she wanted him to fill her whole system with only nothing but him, she couldn't do that now.

They had an agreement. They had a deal: they were both supposed to forget.

When someone approached the famous Duke, she used it as a chance to escape him and rushed to the other side of the room. He was her careless abandon. By being near him, she can't help but feel distracted, helpless, vulnerable and defeated. One more provocative word coming from that smart mouth of his and she'd certainly crumble into pieces and give up herself to him for the second time again. A passing server offered her a glass of champagne and even if she wasn't an alcoholic person, she accepted the drink and drank it up in one straight gulp.

She needed intoxication. Tonight is going to be the worst night ever.

.

People stared at Usui Takumi as he walked around the room full of well-known people. They greeted him and since it was a duty to uphold, he greeted them back. Before Gerard—his stepbrother—succumbed into his inherited disease, he made sure that Takumi would abide by his rules and rule Rochester properly and without any distractions. He followed his brother's orders for the sake of the only woman he ever came to love and now, it was time for him to get her back.

It was his greatest mistake to let her go, and even if she were so different and colder now, he'd get her back. That, too, was an agreement he made with her.

He pined for her night and day, and since he couldn't easily forget her, he kept tabs on her; checking out the current activities she was engaged into as well as her personal life. Nine years was a long time to be separated, and it had really surprise him when she stayed single and uncommitted with anyone. He thought she had moved on from him, and based from her reaction as if she got burned when he touched her, it was already a sign that she was still so conscious of him the way he still yearned for her.

It turns out that she, too, is still unable to free him.

People began to light up the dance floor and whereas Misaki politely accepted brave people who invited her for a dance, she noticed that Takumi was simply standing on a corner, leaning by the wall and is watching her again with too much predilection in his eyes. It made her uncomfortable so she settled on looking on another direction, when all of a sudden; her dance partner yanked her waist closer to his waist. A vein popped on her temple.

The man was an Italian aristocrat, and she wondered how the man was able to get her permission of dancing with her—usually, she was so cold and unsympathetic that when she didn't really feel like it, she'd straightly reject the invite to dance.

"Dr, Ayuzawa, I heard a lot of good things about you."

As he spun her around, she decided to put forth another distance. "Thank you, I hope majority of them aren't mediocre annotations about my supposed lunacy."

The Italian aristocrat chuckled. "Beautiful, yes. Lunatic, no. You are a fine doctor the way you are, Dr. Ayuzawa." He even went as far as leaning forward her as if he was planning to kiss her. Instantly alarmed, Ayuzawa leaned back and away. "And I'm really hoping we could get to know each other—and be more than acquaintances, even."

_That would never happen, bastard. _"I believe the music has already ended. I would need to excuse myself now—"

"But I still wanted to get to know you." There goes that leaning forward again, but before he could completely capture her lips, and before she could pull in her punches, someone pulled the Italian aristocrat hard by the collar of his apparel and yanked him off from the still perplexed Ayuzawa.

"I believe that the next dance is mine." Takumi says confidently and mockingly to the uneducated noble. "And it looked to me as if you were misbehaving in front of the lady." When he dropped his gaze on Misaki, she couldn't help but feel flustered all over again.

The noble snorted at the Duke and in silence, he released Ayuzawa and walked off towards another direction. Due to his arrogance, he went as far as purposefully knocking a server who was trying to balance a tray of drinks on one hand. She was about to help the attendant but Takumi swiftly caught her by the elbow and shook his head.

"Don't," he advised her. "—In this way of life we're leading, sympathy is a stupid emotion. Do not let pity get in the way of your temperament."

Ayuzawa could only do nothing. Because, indeed, the kind of world they are both living now is a domain where even the emotions don't matter and commiseration functions as blasphemy. It was the kind of world not even once in her life, she ever wanted to be part of if only she had a choice. Other waiters aided the waiter but most of the guests feigned ignorance about the disaster that recently happened.

She looked away when everything is settled. "And don't think I'd really dance with you, Takumi. I never agreed on such thing—"

"Don't you think rejecting an English nobleman who invited you for a dance isn't a very wise move?" and without asking for her permission, he got her hand and pulled her in for the waltz position. The waltz is a very controversial dance position even when it was first practiced in England. It was supposed to be only a simple dance move, but when it was Takumi who was instigating the movements, Ayuzawa doesn't feel so comfortable anymore.

The music began to echo around the dream-like ballroom ornamented with different and various luxurious designs, and like the previous moments they've danced before, the couple on the dance floor began to move too. Their movements were graceful, full of subtlety and it looked as if they were no strangers to one another. Spectators stared at the fairy-tale like couple again, it was such a scenic view everybody wondered if they were really strangers with one another. Their movements were sensual, and it was provocative in every way.

Questions began to erupt. _Did they have an unmentioned past?_

Misaki look up at Takumi and was instantly disheartened at the sight of his intense gaze at her. "You really were such a pervert." She commented easily and tried to put some distance between them again since he was too close to only be regarded as people who just met at the charity ball. "Stop staring as if you know me."

"I used to do, didn't I?" he shot back as easily as she does. "We've got an agreement, didn't we? And part of that agreement is that I'd be back when everything else is settled."

"You haven't settled anything yet, Takumi. We're over—"

"We're not yet over. It was you who ended things without even consulting my opinions." When Ayuzawa tried to lean away, Takumi pulled her closer to his body she got slammed against his chest—and she was so certain she heard gasps coming from directions near them. Even so, she tried to act as if it were nothing—as if it didn't bother her in the first place when in fact, his every touch stimulated the cells living inside her.

She wanted to forget him because he left her just as easily when things got complicated. It was the kind of thing she resented most, he left her just when she needed him. True that they've got an agreement, but it was the kind of agreement she chose to forget in order to weaken the pain that kept her heart utterly vulnerable and tormented every sleeping and waking hour of her life.

"Why did you end things, Ayuzawa?" Takumi asked, his grip around her waist and hand tightening. "Why did you suddenly decide to end things that way as if you didn't thought about what it would do to me? Tell me."

"Let me go."

"Don't try to pull a stunt here. We are in a public place." Takumi became forceful as he gripped on her tightly, not allowing letting her go, and proceeded on with their supposed dance. Eyes were on their movements, ears were on the every declaration that would be loud enough to stir speculation, and gossip bordered them as if it were a trap waiting their fall. It was difficult for Misaki to keep a low and calm profile and all the more had it became difficult since she was dancing with the most controversial Duke of England who wasn't giving her any space enough to breathe.

She nearly break her ankle when Takumi continually drag her around, slamming her against his chest whenever he'd spun her and stealing quick touches against her already sensitive and heated skin. She wanted him and she knew that only one word of provocation is needed and both of them would be in each other's arms for the night—and she didn't really want something like that. She had given herself to him more than a couple of times already that when his departure became all too sudden; she was unable to give herself to another man again.

She will never crumble down in defeat in front of Usui Takumi—Walker Takumi, the Duke of England.

She followed Takumi's movements as they glided around the dance floor when all of a sudden, he halted and simply stared at her—they were standing in the middle now. Her heart skidded painfully into another stop too as she met his penetrating emerald eyes.

Misaki had shaken her head. "Do not look at me like that."

All the more had he stared deeply at her. "Why?" Takumi asked expressionlessly. "Is it because I still have the same effect on you? You know you still want me." He made it sound like it was the most obvious thing in the world, and she hated that because it was so easy for him to say those kinds of ridiculous things when she was having difficulty admitting to herself that she still wanted to be trapped inside his arms.

"You don't want me anymore." Ayuzawa tried to make it sound like it was so obvious too. She mirrored the leniency of his voice, wanting nothing but to escape him now or she'll end up surrendering herself again, and it would be too late for her to start anew once he decides to leave again like what he previously did. Bitterness started to color her voice. "You break my heart, Takumi… and now you suddenly wanted me back? What in the world is all that? I walked away… because you decided to suddenly walk away too without any backward glances. Didn't you know how much it hurt me?"

"I know I've hurt you—trust me, I do—but I have no other choices. It is either I'll leave you the way I previously did or Gerard would have to simply pull some strings to make you miserable so I would leave." Takumi reached out for her hand, and she was unable to avoid his sudden touch because his voice was beginning to melt the ice she established around her heart and whole being.

She wanted this. She doesn't want this anymore.

She loves him. She can't love him anymore.

"You're still the same as before." She finally said as cold as she could. "You're still so full of your rubbish of an excuse—and in fact, your vindications are still as hollow as ever." Misaki yanked her hand back polite enough as to not stir some rumor before lowering her head down since he was still a Duke and she was nothing but just some doctor. They are still worlds apart. She was still unworthy of him, and compared to what he's already reach; she was still the garbage that his relatives had once addressed her as.

With those things swirling inside her aching head, she was able to walk away from him; leaving him amidst the dance floor all by himself—because unlike her, Usui Takumi could stand on his own without her by his side.

.

"_You still haven't found him?! How could you be so useless, Ayuzawa?! Heads on the game!"_

Ayuzawa Misaki never really like being branded as a useless person. When she firstly encountered that kind of word probably ages ago, it marked her so well no one was able to save her from the depression she sunk in to. That was the reason why she dedicated herself to studying that people almost questioned her existence—whether she was a robot or not. But she didn't mind what other people commented about her. She was doing all those kinds of things not normal for a mentally healthy person to do in order to chase after a certain someone and prove to him that someone like her—no matter how deprived—could be something of use to the world, too.

And now, here she was, facing the one man who made it look like she was the most useless person that ever existed in the face of the planet, and yet, no matter how far she had already reach, she still felt so tiny next to him as if she had not accomplished anything she wanted to accomplished.

Usui Takumi was just so impeccable that no matter what she does, she wouldn't be able to overthrow him—like their old days.

Ayuzawa snapped her phone shut and walked back to the ballroom where everyone seemed to be having fun. Everybody thought of her as a strong lady, but regardless of what they know, upon graduating, she wasn't that strong of a lady anymore. She only valued her disposition, prioritizing it ahead of anything else. She wanted to become someone whom people would fear.

But ever since she started engaging on activities related to helping the poor and doing charity work to orphanages and other charity establishments, people started to view her differently. They thought it was weird, because when you have everything else in the world, helping the poor already seems a ridiculous thing. In their world, associating oneself with the needy is already either a pretentious or nonsensical deed. But God knows she had a reason for doing so.

Her childhood was a secret to the world she's moving around now, nobody was able to know that she came from a family of a low background—that she used to work at a maid-café and that she studied in a school filled with barbarians for a student. Of course, Seika became a better place now, the number of idiotic and threatening males had lessen and it became such a better place a lot of girls chose to enroll on it. Nonetheless, since the school is still in dire need like before, she obligated herself to donate money on it to improve the well being of the academy that meant a lot to her. Seika had a special place in her heart; it was a home of her once beautiful memories with someone who was able to see through everything about her.

Because on that place, she learned to love… she learned to care… she learned to be compassionate and sensitive and strong… and at the same time, she learned that while she was busy acquiring those kinds of vulnerable emotions, she was starting to become weak, too.

Long ago—even before Cedric Morris spit it out to her as if she wasn't a woman—she had already realized how far their worlds are. That is why she struggled to match him, she wrestled against fate to follow his every footstep, she fought against the people who tried to part them but in the end, she still failed. And now, she was this weak woman now who's still chasing after his shadow.

Because no matter what she does, she will never be able to break free from the tight clutches of her memories of Usui Takumi—the only man she ever came to love.

She pushed stray hair off her face and began to blend in with the crowd again who was all busy socializing with one another. She studied people that surrounded her; it was too different now from the previous life and people she used to associate herself with. It aches her to know that she was once a part of that world, but because she neglected it so much, she's been thrown off wordlessly. But look at that person over there socializing with his fellow noble men. He could fit in so easily unlike her who needed to put in a lot of effort to match the pace of other people.

Ayuzawa busied herself with conversations regarding their plan although she was so certain Usui Takumi was eyeing her every movements and listening to her every words. It ticked her off but she wasn't on the right place to land a punch on that beautiful face of his so he'd learn his lesson for acting like a pervert again. The night went on and on and she was still as conscious as ever when to her extreme vexation, Usui Takumi's party joined in the small group she was conversing with.

A defeated sigh escape her lips. _What does this bastard needs now?_

"Good evening to you, ladies." A man probably on his early thirties greeted them as they politely and casually joined in to their small number. "I noticed that you're all speaking about the new plan the Medical Doctor's Association plans to push on. Dr. Ayuzawa, it's a pleasure to meet the new representative of MDA."

The man was an English nobleman who is probably another acquaintance of the bastard standing next to him. He was a tall man with the same head full of blonde hair and slightly crinkly eyes. She extended her hand out too and shook the hand of the man. "Pleasure to meet you, Sir Beckleham, its good to see you here."

"I heard you were pursuing a plan with regards to the financially unstable." The polite gentleman says in interest that it made her doubt his intentions—people in this world were never like this. They are cold, unfeeling. They are of extremely pretentious personas.

"I am, indeed. Although it is no secret to our class, I would very much prefer to not speak about it so casually unless every single matter related to it has been well ironed and polished."

"Of course, Dr. Ayuzawa." The gentleman said before flicking his blue eyes towards Usui's direction. "I've also heard from Duke Walker that he'd be one to finance your program," he stared at the people involved on their too personal conversation. "—Don't you all think it's such a generous deed for these people prominent on their own lines of profession?"

Ayuzawa was flabbergasted. _Excuse me? _

If there was one thing Ayuzawa hated, it was the fact that no matter what she does, she was still in love with Usui Takumi. During their childhood romance, she clung onto him as if he was the only thing that mattered. She refused to let him go for his short trips to England, not because she didn't trust him but because she was so certain his family would make another move to part them again. She valued him, only him mattered and she had given her every affection on him because she knew that he's the only one for her. They were happy, and somehow, she was able to tell that what they have will last until they are old and grey.

Until he decided to finally utter a final goodbye.

Nothing else could compare to the pain she felt when he left with that smile on his face after voicing out their agreement. She used to be strong, she was no student council president for nothing and she wanted him back. Her love for him is something that could never be explained—it was beyond words. When he left, it's like everything just disappeared with him. There weren't any traces, not even a vague shadow that would remind her of the past.

The memories, they were the strongest evidence of his existence. But not so long after his departure, he began to fear that those memories could be things she created in order to escape something painful. She didn't want that. She didn't want Takumi to become just a figment of his imagination. In some deeper region of her mauled heart, she was so certain he existed and that they shared those memories together—hidden kisses… blunt gazes… soft caresses… affectionate words… and love. She was certain it was something he shared with someone… felt with someone… experienced with someone.

She didn't have much power back then, and she doubted if she had now. Gerard died a long time ago as soon as Takumi was announced Duke. But even if he had already died, it's as if his strong unseen presence was still able to pull them apart.

The agreement was still effective.

So, Takumi was the financer of their program and on such situations, she wanted to do nothing but to simply walked away and escaped it all. She wanted to see her mother she haven't seen for a long time, she wanted to see her sister who hated her for what she has done to herself—she wanted to be reminded of the past because no matter what she does, wherever she go—although she doesn't have any places to go back to anymore—she was kept reminded of the nightmare that ruined every thing about her.

When Usui Takumi disappeared, everything else vanished—they were just gone. And it was never the same again. She neglected everything until she's been thrown off. She pushed away her family and left everyone behind, and now, she was all alone again. She's always been alone. There's nowhere to go back to anymore… and nobody else awaits her arrival.

When Usui Takumi left… there was nothing left for her but only nothing.

She felt someone moved behind her and when the shadow finally came into the light of the full moon she was standing under since she was on a balcony, it no longer surprised her that it was no one but Usui Takumi.

Another exhale escaped her. "Congratulations on ruining my night… and my whole life, Usui. You've done sow ell I'm never ever going to doubt your skills again."

"You know I never intended to do that."

"_Misaki, I love you."_

"I've got my reasons for doing this. And I was expecting you'd be able to understand. I wanted nothing else in this world but you."

"_But I have to leave. Let's_ _j_ust _do it this way; forget about me… and start a new life, as we didn't exist at all—as if our relationship didn't exist at all. It's the only way for you to forget the pain."_

_How am I supposed to forget the pain?_

"_That is our agreement."_

_How am I supposed to agree on something that would only drive me to the edge of insanity? Why did you suddenly decide on things like this? Why so sudden? Since when did you start thinking that this would be fine for me?_

"_And then, I'll be back."_

Misaki stared at Takumi for the longest time she ever stared at him again ever since they've bumped in here—now—and she felt as if she was giving herself away again. She familiarized herself with the face of the man who was able to won her heart without even doing anything. He showed her kindness back then, he showed her love, he showed her the side of fun she was unable to experience after her father left, he showed her how it would feel if she loosen up a bit… he showed her everything… he showed her the world she was never able to accept since she knew from the beginning that that world would take him away… and then, he'd given himself to her and left a huge piece of him inside her which never made forgetting easier.

_Why? Why must I love you so badly?_

"Ayuzawa…"

_Why must I love you so badly when I was so certain that one day—again—you'd leave me like what you've done nine horrible years ago?_

A crevice formed in her heart and she was certain she's beginning to crumble away because he was messing her firm belief again. Without even having to do something grand, Usui Takumi was able to capture her heart again, and it was utterly ridiculous on her part since he's been hurting her for as long as she could remember.

Ayuzawa looked away from him and into the beautiful horizon the balcony is offering her—the sight was a breath of fresh air since it overlooks the beautiful scenery of Cambridge and eases the growing pain in her heart. "You already have everything, why else do you want me back?"

"You seriously think I wanted this _everything_ you're talking about?" a frustrated chuckle escaped Takumi's throat. "All I ever wanted is you."

"You walked away from that person you were saying as someone you've only ever wanted!"

"Because I have to." His voice was still calm unlike hers since the heat of the moment is betraying everything about her. "It is the only way of protecting you from the Walker family. I need to do it. I was welcomed by different tactics they'd do—"

"Gibberish. Good night, Duke Walker—"

But before she could simply walk away, Takumi yanked her by the elbow and dragged her towards the dark corner of the balcony before spinning her around to capture her lips. It was rough at first and she was unwilling to respond because his aggressive touch had only given more emphasis to the stimulation she was feeling upon seeing him right from the beginning. She keeps on pulling away but his hold was firm and once she makes a noise, everything is over for the persona she's let others know her as.

Unbeknownst to the crowd, the Duke and the Doctor had a fate much more terrible than the others. It was a love never forgotten, a love that was unable to push through its predicaments, it was a love that was able to ruin the life of many—those involve most especially.

When Ayuzawa stopped struggling to escape Takumi's grip, his kisses began softer and it only reminded her of what and who he was in her life. It was acquisitive. He was acquisitive. He left her and still, he wanted her all for himself. That was the reason why either of them was unable to forget. It wasn't because of the physical attraction that inclined them towards each other. It was because of the gravity, the spark, which gravitated them with each other and made them unable to pull away no matter how they want it. They were preordained; they already knew that from the beginning. And no matter what predicament the world throws at them, they know they would surpassed it even without doing anything because the gravitational pull the world had placed upon them is something that would lead them back in each others arms again.

That is how much they were connected with each other.

She was hurt, that was something Ayuzawa was certain of but for once in her life, she was so certain she was never mad at him because someday, he'd be back and free her from the tight binds of their chronicles. The anger was another pretense—a show—so she'd be able to remember. Because even if she was showing the world how angry she was with Usui Takumi and that she wanted nothing but to forget, by the end of the day, it was in their memories together she finds comfortable solace the most. It was the kind of action that whenever she'd close her eyes so she'd be able to relax from the tiring and monotonous activities of the day, she'd be able to see him. He was with her and they were relaxing together like the old times. She'd feel his touches, hear his calm breathing against her head, sense the ghost his kisses on every part of her skin, and perceive the drum-like beating of his heart since it would only beat so fast whenever she was near him—like what's happening now.

She began to kiss him back as hungrily as he was doing. They haven't seen each other for exactly nine years, and she was unable to comprehend how she was able to survive living without him. _How was she able to let herself miss something like this? _Her still clumsy hands trace the hard plains of his clothed chest and even more had it stimulated the heat forming inside her. Under her soft touches, she felt the harsh beat of his heart, and it was the only provocation she needed to crumble into pieces and give herself to him again. It was stupid, but they were already past the age were sex outside the boundaries of marriage is considered as transgression. And they were already grown up adults. No matter what happens, she is now able to stand on her two feet and face the repercussions that possibly await them.

She didn't realized when Takumi was able to pull her out of the balcony without their usual spectators seeing them, and dragged her back to his room—to her room, whomever this room belonged to—and do what they've been wanting to do ever since they met again. Misaki was never sure afterward if she would have protested again given a moment or two to think about it. Takumi didn't give her that moment or two. She felt him lift her up into his arms and carry her up from the cool hallway and inside his room, conscious of a tiny shock that he could do that so easily and that she could enjoy it as much.

The sensations rushed in and pushed everything else aside. The doubt is beginning t disappear, the earlier façade dissipated with the wind, the supposed anger was replaced with too much love both parties had kept well hidden from the rest of the world. Clothing falling away, sliding against her skin, making her vulnerable from the cold November wind. But his arms were on her, warm and hard and urgent. The feeling of his hard and powerful body against her own searching fingers. Ayuzawa's heart hammered against her ribcage and her breath came in quick and shallow. Then the bed beneath her, disconcertingly soft and not at all like that thin piece of furniture inside his own flat that reminded her when they first made love with one another.

It was a dizzying reminder that nearly a dozen years had passed, and her own body insisted she understand that. She was no virginal girl now, shy and terrified of what she wanted, and Takumi wasn't that gentle, careful young man so intent on not hurting her that it hadn't occurred to him there might be another price demanded of them for those few minutes of incredible closeness.

"Ayuzawa…"

Takumi was beginning to be a bit rougher now, more direct, more insistent, his hunger for her was so fierce that it was a caress all its own, touching her deepest instincts, igniting a response as involuntary as the beating of her own heart. She reached out for him blindly, needing him to be as close as he could possibly be. Her arms held him but it wasn't enough. Her body held him but it was never close enough. She needed him closer.

Closer.

It had shocked Takumi, the first time it happened. When didn't he ever get surprise by Ayuzawa's gestures and movements? He always finds her amusing that's why he was unable to let go. His memories of hers were the only thing that kept him sane during his stay at England. He anticipated for her every night, his eagerness to see her again and kiss her and make love with her the moment he sees her became so fierce it even went to the point he nearly and carelessly—and recklessly—fly back to Japan again so he could see her. Takumi wanted nothing else but Ayuzawa. He could live without all his wealth and luxury so long as she's with him. He could endure everything else—but the only thing he'd never overlook is seeing her get hurt because of him that's why he left.

He left her and he left his heart with her. He was so certain Ayuzawa would hate him for what he's done and he decided with a broken heart that he'd accept that because eventually, fate would bring them back together because they were meant. It was the kind of belief he had hold on to for the past nine years.

Nothing in his life had prepared him for the incredibly intimate closeness Ayuzawa offered. No—demanded. Passion and need had seared away everything but instinct, and in joining physically with the man she loved so painfully it was still hurting her, Ayuzawa's instincts had driven her to mate in the deepest possible way.

And this time, Takumi was ready for it.

Takumi caught his breath just as she did, staring into her amber eyes as her senses blend in with his, her thoughts, her emotions. It was something deeper than sharing, something more elemental and absolute. It has always been like this for both of them. Whenever he'd make love with her, it always felt as if he was leaving a big part of him inside her, and she was transferring everything about her in him. It was odd—bizarre—because he was able to feel her emotions when they first made love with each other. He was able to sense if she was distress, if she was slightly harmed, or if she was thinking about him because certainly, he was also and always thinking about her. She never left his mind. He loved her so much dating another woman became impossible—not like it had crossed his mind before. Because for him, if it wasn't Ayuzawa Misaki—an uninterested victor who won his heart without even having to do anything—then, she wouldn't be good enough.

Their hearts beat with precisely the same rhythm, their breathing was perfectly in synchronization, their bodies moved with a single will.

"_Did I ever tell you how much I love your eyes?"_

"_Why?"_

"_Because it makes my heart comfortingly warm."_

"_Why does it make your heart warm, Takumi?"_

_He kissed her on the forehead with so much affection it nearly melted her heart. "Because you are—and will always be—my personal sun."_

They were one.

_._

Ayuzawa was so certain everything wasn't a dream but she never regretted any of it. It was already expected that former lovers would meet on the most unexpected of times and a new history would be made. Her mother used to tell her that if you were really fated with one another, no matter how much distance was put amidst you two, no matter what kind of predicament you were to face, as long as you two have faith and trust on each other, then everything else would be surpassed.

Life is an endless form of challenges and predicaments, but the most beautiful part is knowing that what awaits you in the end is a happy ending. If you haven't seen the happy ending yet, then it means that it isn't the end yet. Trust and faith is an essential prerequisite when engaging in a relationship. It was the kind of emotion that makes love unforgotten.

And it will always be a love unforgotten.

Another fissure formed in her heart when she felt Takumi stir behind her since she decided not to face him. She was still distraught. All the more she would never be able to forget. The way he made love with her, it was different than the first time they've done it. He was so careful back then, so controlled. But now, he was releasing inside her his every emotion, he was giving away too much… he was offering something new—and it bothered her because she was still uncertain of everything. If they were together again, then, it would be no secret to the world they are living in now. The nightmare could happen again and once it does, she was uncertain of the repercussions.

He left her once. He could leave her again.

If that were to happen, then, there really would be nowhere else for her to go. It would be like in the past, only a lot worser now since unlike before, no one would comfort her since everyone else was gone. She left them behind in the world she previously lived in to pursue a very selfish path to search again for her one true love.

Her heart had beaten rapidly again and she swiftly placed her fist above her heart as if to stop it or Takumi might hear.

On cue, Takumi spoke, "Ayuzawa."

"Silence…" she was able to say, her voice was too weak willed to properly voice it out. She heard Takumi sigh and felt him move closer to her before wrapping his arm around her; yanking her closer to his hard body. She didn't want him closer but at the same time, she does, so swiftly she searched for his too warm hand and held t tightly against hers. Takumi rose above her and hid a kiss on her bare shoulder and neck and lay flat comfortably next to her.

It was a cessation of hostility for the former lovers who went through thick and thin and was able to save everything by leaving each other behind. In fact, it was a smart move—it was predestined that one day, one of them has to leave—because the distance would only draw their hearts closer to one another. It was a great move—a brave move that had only given more emphasis to this their passionate faith to one another despite their horrible distance.

Takumi was too aware of that. She loves Ayuzawa and she equally loves him back. Aurora was still hours away, it would give them enough time to relish the precious connection they have all night. He kissed her shoulders again and in return, Ayuzawa lifted their clasped hands up to her lips and gave another sensual kiss, too. He wanted more of her, he wanted to make love with her every minute of their lives but for now, he was sated by simply having her inside his arms.

Tomorrow is another uncertain day, but they were both certain that when they are both ready, when everything else is settled, when duty already means less to them and their past already serves as a reminder of their faith with one another and not an obvious ache to their existence, then, the world would finally let them be together. That much they are both aware of.

Stupor clouded their tired minds and bodies and with nothing but calmness surrounding them, another written destiny came to life.

Ayuzawa Misaki and Usui Takumi sleep in each other's arms that night.

.

PP


End file.
